Wednesday, December 26, 2012


It was another day at the grind and exams the previous week hadn't gone quite as I wanted but nonetheless I survived to live another day. The following days were our last in this horrible place, where people came in dozens curled up in pain or "electively" as "they" like to say (who would do such a thing electively?) in order to be put under the knife, consenting for their innermost to be explored in the literal sense of it. After weeks of torture it was finally going to be over, our seniors didn't say much but you could feel they were starting to give way and allow us time to ourselves as it came well earned after many a long day. 
My friend casually asked me would you like to go to the cinema with her and I said yes quickly. I embraced every moment of not being here. So it was decided we would go the following day after the early morning march around the wards and barrage of questions for which we seldom knew the answer. On that fateful day my monthly reminder came and so I was in cramping fits but on the surface I was as quiet as a sleeping baby only giving away my torment with a slight crease of the forehead ever so often. But it was decided so I took what I could and off we went not without a few glitches but alas we went. 
Now it would be a great opportunity to say I had no idea what exactly we were going to see and neither did I care much. On arriving I read the charts it was single screen cinema showing a double and they were (in no particular order) Breaking Dawn pt 2 and Life of Pi. The first was somewhat familiar but I must confess I've never seen any of the previous parts in full and I really don't care to but here I was seeing the 3rd part...or is it the 4th? I have no idea but all in all I couldn't care less, I was just here to relax and refresh my dulled out senses. 
With eminent hunger on its way I made my way to the cafeteria to stock up for an estimated 3 1/2 hours of audio-visual entertainment. Yet again I had to be contented with pastry when I really wanted something savoury to eat, it was the midday showing after all. Too little places cater to our every Halal needs. Nevertheless I sat and was pleased to see curtains retracted and having seated midway into the cinema hall it felt comfortable and soothing. After a few minutes of new adverts for upcoming movies to entice the crowds to come back the first one started...I heard music...south-east asian music to be exact..hmm queer. Clearly I didn't have a hoot about the other movie. Saw some animals, all in a very ethnic setting. I was perplexed, this must be that other movie about the life of someone, maybe it was an Indian. 
I sat back and from the very start to the finish my curiosity peaked. The Life of Piscine Molitor Patel better known as Pi and in 3D for that matter. Can an inanimate movie made to play on emotion actually do just that? It did, it was love not at first sight but love nonetheless. The story, the journey, the struggle all meshed into a movie that will remain in my memory for a very long time. I couldn't stop there I had to read the novel, it had plainly come across the screen that it was directed based on it. The first book store I tried didn't have it, can you imagine? I tried a second much smaller book store and the attendant nodded yes they have it when I asked. My heart was overjoyed, its the smallest of things that take my breath away. I had it in my hand and soon in my shopping bag and off I set off to do more errands and then home to where the journey would begin again. This time correctly and not tainted by director's need to please the masses. 
I lapped up every inch of it, every line, every word from the front to the back including the reviews...every single letter in just about 3 days. You must say a long time for a book of 354 pages especially if I was so compelled to read it. It did not disappoint and my taking so long to read it was because life is not a library no matter how much we wish it to be. If justification is needed I used every minute of the time I did have free. 
If you've read till here and still reading, I applaud you. Reading is indeed an art but slowly becoming dead. It envelopes our ability to imagine to interpret never given never underestimated. This book has inspired me to write again...a joy I once took with great passion. Imagine what it could do for you? Until another time I leave you with these words of Yann Martel.."To choose doubt as a philosophy of life is akin to choosing immobility as a means of transportation."


Blogging with purpose, 

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Emotion of the Heart - 4th Blog Anniversary

All praise is due to the Most High

I am thankful for what was given to me and what was not and I pray that the expressions of my inner voice will always be expressed. Indeed blessed to have the opportunity to reach the 4th year since I've started on that day of the 20th August, 2008. I penned this poem after so many days of not writing . Enjoy. 

Emotion of the Heart

I don't know where to begin or start, 
I guess I shall begin with what is in my heart, 
As emotion begins to set apart, 
The tiniest of things became art, 
A need for love,
But found only unworthy of, 
A time of need, 
Has lost to the never ending greed, 
What shall express what is hidden? 
What shall not extend into the forbidden?
A love lost is one too many, 
Yet I shall not crumble to any,
Too few stay, 
Far more walk away, 
Am I true to this heart that has never failed?
Or are my failures mirrorred in those who betrayed?
As the last light begins to fade, 
I drown my own as I prayed,
One cannot continue this charade, 
As the hand of justice indeed swayed , 
I've lost but I shall not stop searching, 
In one last attempt I am beseeching, 
To find what must be found, 
To live freely to this heart's sound,
My fate sealed and bound.

September 01st, 2012


Blogging with purpose, 

Monday, June 18, 2012


I am happy to be where I am. Expectations have merged into acceptance and whatever happens I am happy with it. This I tell myself but hope has never left. In the face of it all I am happy to be as I am. No one can bring happiness to me as it is only possible through self realisation. For as long as I have known myself, time has passed, people have left and few have stayed but even then there is always the potential for happiness. We hold on to our dear ones in times of prioritisation and then complicated becomes straight forward. The clutter is cleared away and we can open our eyes once more. We see what is indeed important and what is indeed instrumental to happiness. 

Hold on to those that were given to us and let go of those that weren't. Preoccupation with the unattainable is like chasing after clouds. Keeping in mind dreams are not clouds and clouds are not dreams. A person who cannot dream has no potential and life has no depth or meaning. It is hard at times but I am still happy to be where I am. It is already mid year and 2012 has only just begun...or is it just me? Time is losing its value but yet so many cannot afford it. A commodity of the rich yet they spare not even a second in their quest for more, so who truly enjoys time? 

In my days ahead of me I hope that I can at least be a passenger going with time and not against it. I hope that I will remain happy to be where I am and who I am. 

Blogging with purpose, 
I leave you with a beautiful song which has but little to do with the theme of this blog entry but still enjoy! :)

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Happy Days

All Praise is due to the Most High, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

"The miracle is not that we do this work, but that we are happy to do it." ~ Mother Teresa

How better to start off my first blog entry for this year than with these words? Today after many days have indeed passed I am finally putting thoughts to words. The sun has peaked its beautiful face out and all the trees, flowers and birds seem to be smiling and singing a happy song. God is great...indeed! Life is happening all around us and hope can be found even when isolation is knocking at the door.

These are the days I will remember for a very long time and as I have adjusted it seems soon I must adjust back to my usual cup of tea. I can't help but feel that I would soon miss these days that at the start seemed inevitably and dauntingly long. I must endure I said to myself and slowly but surely endurance turned into enjoyment and oh how sweet that transition is. Family and friends, I am indeed blessed and for them I will remain indebted for days past, now and always.

Being different is easily envied. At some point, it may be true that everyone wants to be the centre of attention. However it is hardly ever desired in those who are. I have learnt to accept all of mine and to be able to be me through it all. Always a challenge at first but soon life continues to happen. Being true to oneself is the best way to accompany that cycle.

I thank all who have given me this opportunity and I remain forever more humble, grateful and insightful as I have ever been.

Blogging with purpose,
Le-Ann Mariamlelue